Wednesday, February 5, 2014

No Gym For Me.

That's right. I don't wanna go to the gym. But I want to lose weight and be healthy. Isn't that oxymoronic and crazy?

There is a laundry list of reasons why I don't want a gym membership, the number one being FINANCES. Even if it's only $10 a month, that's $120/year. Two or so of those could get me my very own elliptical. My. Very. Own. Elliptical. And I have room for it in my house. No reason why I couldn't slip my big toy in with the little girls' (eh, engines'- more on that later) toys, right? Or I could get 13 or 14 meals at Chipotle. Or a night out at Six Flags with the fam (which is awesome, especially when a mini-you likes the same rides you do). Or a bunch of clothing for the tornadoes girls. You get the idea.

Privacy. Yeah, there's just something about being seen in public as a sweating, winded hot mess, whilst enclosed in a huge, oft-crowded room. At least at home it's only my family (if them) that sees me.

The pool's not what it's cracked up to be, if there is one. Seriously. The last time I went into a gym swimming pool it was so ice-cold it took me 20 minutes to get in. And I could barely move, let alone get laps in, without fear of bumping into my fellow gym-rats. No thanks. It's like... swimming laps while playing dodgeball.

Bikes. They're a reason to join, and not to join. Our city is (believe it or not) very bike-friendly and you see TONS of cyclists when the weather is right. But let's face it, when it's cold/rainy/stormy, they have nowhere to ride. However, the seats are horrible. Even after buying a seat pad, I was still miserable unless I rode on a recumbent bike, which has a much more comfortable seat. But at least with your own bike, even if the seat is just as brutal, it's yours. No one else's sweat has been all over that thing, unless you let your SO borrow it.

Childcare. If the hunny is working or working out himself, I'm pretty much stuck at home with the girls. And if they're napping and the house is clean (HA!), I have nothing else to do! Even with a mile-long to-do list, I can probably whittle out some time, from somewhere. Even if it means plopping the girls in front of the TV to watch cute little dolls or choo-choos for a bit and they chill while I exercise, it can be done. And those cute little cartoons won't charge an extra fee or become overwhelmed, assuming the tornadoes don't join me in my little quest. And that right there is almost a reason not to join. At a gym, very rarely is/are one's kid(s) allowed to join in on the workout, leading to many potentially missed awesome memories. I'll shut up on that one before I get all sappy.

Weights. Store 'em in a closet. They're really not that expensive, until maybe you get to the benches and bars. Which I'm convinced I can live without. (See last sentence of bikes paragraph above.)

The Drive. Almost right up there with childcare. The gas costs alone are enough to make you break out in a nice sweat before you even get to the gym, depending on the gym's proximity to where you live. Of course, if your heart rate increases with said sweat, it could burn some extra calories, right?

Depending on how you think, as shown, these can easily be reasons for or against the case for a gym membership. I think I'll keep my tornadoes with me so that we can all laugh at my attempts to dance around.


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